These childless women are happy Why arent they believed

These childless women are happy Why arent they believedThese childless women are happy Why arent they believedWhen Red Sky PR CEO Jessica Flynn told a leader at her workdistributionspolitik she had some exciting news to share, their interaction didnt go as expected.Youre pregnant exclaimed the other woman. Um, nope, Flynn said. Youre getting married she guessed. Wrong again - Flynn informed her she was leaving to abflug her own company. That small interaction has stuck with Flynn for over a decade.While Id dealt with the incessant questions about my marital aspirations and my ticking time clock before and since, this is the anecdote I always remember, Flynn said. It crystalized that no matter what accomplishments I may achieve in the business world, in my community, in my relationships - there will always be the question about why I didnt have children.Women who choose bedrngnis to have children have a variety of reasons for making this decision.I never had any burning desire to ha ve children. I thought it was just something that would happen along the way, but it didnt, Christina Previte, a lawyer, said. I think it wouldve been nice to have children, but I personally dont need to have children to feel complete or have a full and vibrant life.I will admit that when I was in my 20s and early 30s, I had assumed I would be a mother, Jennifer Bauer, a life coach, said. I didnt question societys expectations for my role as a woman. It took wisdom and experience to realize that I didnt actually want that life.Some women find opportunities to nurture and mentor others through their careers.After suffering a miscarriage a few months after we got married, the choice was taken from me when we couldnt get pregnant again, Carol Gee, a writer, said. After leaving the military, I began a career as an educator first at the juniorchef college level and then university level. Being surrounded by students fulfilled my need to nurture, to mother, mentor and guide. I am play mom , second mom, god mommy, and mother-figure to a number of young adults both with mothers and without.I was ambivalent about having children throughout my 30s, another woman, Michelle McAnaney, said. I think my job working as a college consultant, helping high school students choose and apply to colleges, is enough to fulfill the nurturer in me. Because I work with my students virtually, I can travel frequently and I would have to drastically change my lifestyle to accommodate the needs of my children.For other women, their reason to forgo traditional motherhood can boil down to a simpler, tongue-in-cheek reason - selfishness.I chose not to have children because Im selfish, Brittany Garcia said. Its not a popular thing to say, but I am. I like to sleep late on the weekends. I like to spend my money on what I want. I dont want to monitor my kids social media accounts, screen time, or manage curfews.I am able to be very selfish. What I mean by that is my life is not dictated by the ne eds of my children. I can travel whenever I want to, even on a moments notice, Previte echoed.Unfortunately, although none of the above womens decisions impacts anyone beyond themselves, weve still not reached a place societally where the choice to remain childless is free of judgment. For many, being subjected to other peoples opinions persists as a drawback of this lifestyle.I honestly struggle to think of any drawbacks - other than the endlessly condescending nature of most of the rest of the world about it, one woman, Ruth Attwood, explained.When I was in my late 30s, I was dating an older man whod had his children, was divorced, and wanted more, Nancy Irwin, a doctor, said. Over dinner one night in a restaurant fairly soon in our relationship, he was rather relentless in wanting to know why Id never chosen to have children and did not plan to going forward. When Id had enough of his peppering me with questions, I let him know that he was making me uncomfortable he stated flat out Well, if you never have a child, youre not really a woman.I stood up, threw down some cash for my portion of the uneaten food, and walked out and hailed a cab.Judgment comes frequently from members of one own family, too.My mother-in-law refers to me as the mother of her unborn grandchildren - not even as her sons wife, which would only be slightly less insulting, Garcia said. I have a masters degree I have a good job and am the primary breadwinner of our household. And yet my worth, in her eyes, lies only in my ability to bear children. Thankfully, my own mother thinks its wonderful that we live in a day and age where this truly is considered a choice and not just what you do. Aside from hearing rude comments from other people, some women have also considered the question of who will care for them in the future as a drawback.As I get older, I do think about not having children to do for me what my brothers and I have done for our dad, who has Alzheimers, says Sandy Weaver. Des pite this concern, Sandy found a solution Good insurance, good savings and good friends should take care of me, if and when a time comes that I cant care for myself.Whatever path you take, its ultimately your choice and life.We all make our choices about where we put our time, energy and passion, Flynn said. So what makes one persons choice better than any other? Ive chosen to put my time and energies into my relationship with my partner, deep friendships, contributing and engaging in my community, and into my professional ambitions. If only the world would respect and value that.I get a lot of youll change your mind, which is just insulting, Garcia said. As if I havent carefully thought this through. I know that at the ripe old age of 36, the clock is ticking on this choice. And yet its still a choice I make every morning when I take my birth control pill.A version of this deutsche bundespost previously appeared onFairygodboss, the largest career community that helps women get the inside scoop on pay, corporate culture, benefits, and work flexibility. Founded in 2015, Fairygodboss offers company ratings, job listings, discussion boards, and career advice.